All that I am, all that I ever was…

I am more than my mental health. I am more than my homelessness. I am more than any one aspect of me. I am Addy. And this is…


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Coping Skills: Fifty Things of Self-Love

Earlier this year I wrote a post called Coping Skills, which shared a coping skills worksheet that came to me via Indigo Daya’s website. One of the categories on this work-sheet was ‘self-love’, which are all the things you can do to love (or care) for yourself in times of distress.

In this section of the work-sheet I wrote:

Me? Love myself? You gotta be kidding, right? This never happens…but I know it ’should’ be happening, so I seriously need to sit down and try to work out some ways that will allow me to love myself. I just don’t know how anymore. :(

Now, six months on – and to celebrate my 550th post! – I’ve decided to take up the challenge and come up with fifty things of self-love; for how can I ever hope to experience positive emotions again (e.g. happiness, joy, contentment, relaxation, nurture etc.) if I don’t know what will bring them on?

My Self-Love List

A few notes on the above list:

(i) For the sake of clarification, I decided that ‘my’ definition of self-love is: ‘anything I can do to feel something other than shit’. Your definition may be different (and involve less/more swear words!)

(ii) In terms of the final count, instead of merely stating movies, books etc. I decided to expand these sections by listing the five most awesome candidates. It is these five things that are included in the final count of fifty, not the movies, books etc. genres themselves.

(iii) And for all of you rolling your eyes at ‘masturbation’ and ‘kissing/sex/oral sex’…What? I’m just being honest! :p

Now, over to you…what things do you do to love yourself in times of distress?
Are you willing to take the fifty things of self-love challenge?


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Coping Skills

We all have good days and bad days. For some of us, especially if mental health issues are involved, the bad days can be all-consuming, so when they hit we need to have the coping skills to deal with the emotional distress we find ourselves in.

My support worker recently gave me a worksheet – created by Indigo Daya (a Melbourne based mental health trainer, consultant and change agent) – that gives advice on how we can help ourselves cope during such difficult times, across six different aspects of our lives:

Coping Skills

Worksheet Layout and Text © Indigo Daya

On the reverse of the worksheet there is space for you to write about the various coping skills that work best for you. You’re also encouraged to print out a copy so you can refer to it in times of need. Whilst I’ve stuck my hard-copy on the fridge, I’ve also decided to include a version of it here on the off-chance it will inspire someone in ways they may not have thought of.

In working through the worksheet it became apparent to me how reliant I am on the distraction set of coping skills. In fact, aside from the occasional moment of emotional release, virtually all of my coping mechanisms fall into this category.

This realisation has encouraged me to look at some other coping skills (such as grounding and self-love) to see if I can create some new skills to better assist with distressing periods, especially when lack of concentration makes it difficult to focus on any distractions.

My Coping Skills

Worksheet Layout © Indigo Daya

If you would like to view Indigo Daya’s Coping Skills worksheet and print a copy to complete yourself, you can do so here.

Whilst I work on the areas I’m lacking skills in, I’m interested in how other people cope with life’s distresses. Do you tend to rely on distraction? Or are you more a self-love or emotional release person?

Feel free to leave any coping skills advice in the comments below, who knows, you may find yourself accessing your higher self and helping someone else. :)