Due to Samantha’s swollen (and still painful) posterior I agreed to do two things after we left the hotel.
1) That we would visit McDonalds so Samantha could indulge in her favourite delicacy: the sausage and egg mcmuffin.
2) That I would carry her, fireman’s lift style, to ease the pain she had whilst walking.
So there I was, in the early hours of Friday morning, carrying two bags with a woman slung over my shoulder. I’ll admit it wasn’t an easy balancing act, but given Samantha kept bursting into fits of laughter about the whole affair, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I even snuck in a couple of playful spanks (which only caused her to chuckle even more) for her incessant complaining that I wasn’t taking her to her chosen destination fast enough.
When we did finally arrive at the nearest McDonalds I lowered Samantha to the ground, watched her rearrange her skirt and then bolt into the restaurant with gleeful abandon.
After informing me of her desires – two McMuffins, three hash-browns and an orange juice – she abandoned me at the counter to find somewhere to sit. What happened next has baffled me to this day. From afar I watched Samantha saunter around the restaurant as she mulled over where she wanted to sit. After finally deciding on a table close to the window she tossed her hand-bag onto one of the seats and, without pausing for breath, threw herself onto the hard plastic chair.
The reaction was immediate! With a yelp that startled the baffled assistant, Samantha shot into the air and grabbed her ass with both hands, cursing everything from the air that we breathe to her own stupidity. I, being the ever caring chap that I am, burst into laughter; laughter that drew all manner of evil stares from Sammi. Completely ignoring me she grabbed her bag and walked to the front door, still rubbing her ass, and leaned against the exterior window.
Moments later, bag of goodies in hand, I joined her outside where I tried desperately not to burst into laughter again. She too, was trying hard not to laugh. After a few moments of smirks, shaken heads and steely glances we decided that the best option would be to head to a nearby park where the grass would be decidedly softer than those hard, harsh beast-like chairs resident within McDonalds.