All that I am, all that I ever was…

I am more than my mental health. I am more than my homelessness. I am more than any one aspect of me. I am Addy. And this is…

{NSFW} 30 Days of Kink: The Final Eight

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As it has taken me so long to polish off this challenge (coming on thirteen months now!) I’ve decided enough is enough! So, in one semi-epic post, I’m answering the remaining eight prompts in the 30 Days of Kink challenge! Enjoy!

And yes, I’m aware that there were lots of exclamation points in those few sentences…but I’m not apologizing for it. Exclamation points are, after all, the ‘jazz hands’ of the punctuation world! :p

artisticbutt

Day 28: The beauty of being a pure spanko means that all I need to enjoy my kink is a human posterior and something to smack it with

Day 23: Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed?  How so?

I’ve been pondering on this question as I write the answers to the seven questions below, and I honestly don’t think they have. Other than the shift from pure-submissive to switch that occurred during my teen years, my fantasies and interests in the realm of spanking have remained relatively consistent for the last twenty-odd years.

Perhaps when I get the chance to explore these desires in real-life, rather than in my mind, there will be a shift in perspective. We’ll just have to wait (with bated breath) and see!

Day 24: What qualities do you look for in a partner?

Six things that I look for in a partner are:

1. Intelligence; given the mind is the most sexual organ in the body, someone who knows how to use theirs is of paramount importance.
2. Honesty; as I have been cheated on, abused and generally treated like shit by all of my prior girlfriends, the ability to be open and honesty about themselves and their feelings is more than necessary!
3. Compassion; as I have been cheated on, abused and generally treated like shit by all of my prior girlfriends, the ability to be compassionate toward themselves and others is more than necessary!
4. Playfulness; being mature and grown up is all well and good, but it’s also boring. Being able to channel one’s inner-child and have a bit of a play is something I find gloriously appealing.
5. A spankable posterior; okay, so it stands out as being the only physical aspect on this list, but if I find honesty attractive, maybe other people do to! :p
and
6. A bit of a geeky side; do you know your Like-Likes from your Goombas? Your Drashigs from your Zygons?  If so, you’re definitely in with a chance with sexy-ole me! ;)

Obviously there are more qualities I look for than this, such as; eyes, sense of humour, adventurous streak, sense of one’s values, adaptability and a love of potatoes, so if anyone’s interested in the full list, you can always express your desire to see! :)

Day 25: How open are you about your kinks?

Although some would argue that I’m more open than most – especially given that I write about my spanking fetish on a blog that is primarily about my journey with mental illness – I’m not as open as I would like to be.

If I had the choice, I would like to be as open about my spanking predilection as I am about my bipolar, PTSD, social anxiety and homelessness. I would like to talk about it, share it with people and openly discuss it, but alas, I cannot.

Unfortunately, having a spanking fetish is often looked down upon by the wider community. It is seen as sexual deviancy, disgusting, wrong and those who practice it are seen as repulsive, perverted or just plain evil, all points of view that (however absurd) force people like me to hide their passions for fear of being ostracized, attacked or (in extreme cases) lynched.

So I shall have to continue hiding it until the rest of society grows up and starts understanding that everyone is different and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Day 26: What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?

Given that – a few spankings aside – most of my spanking play has been in the online world, I have zero problem with people exploring their kinky side via the internet, as long as they are as open and honest in the cyber world as they would have to be in real-life.

Alas, as with other areas of the ‘net, far too often people hide behind the anonymity the internet provides, and instead of sharing themselves with openness and honesty, resort to lying and subterfuge to have their needs met.

Unlike many, I want to talk to the real person, not the persona they manufacture for the cyber world to see, which is probably why I haven’t played online in a very long time.

Zelda

Day 24: A bit of a geeky side; do you know your Like-Likes from your Goombas? Your Drashigs from your Zygons? If so, you’re definitely in with a chance with sexy-ole me! ;)

Day 27: Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?

Absolutely they do! My spanking fetish is simply a tiny thread in the multicolored tapestry that is me, so it stands to reason that sometimes the non-kink threads overlap with this one.

Whether it be fantasies (that I hope to make a reality) of Zelda/Link spanking fun, literary kinkiness or spankings that are played out beneath a deep blue sky in the middle of a hike, I relish every moment that my non-kink and kink sides overlap!

Day 28: How do you dress for kink/BDSM play?  What significance does your attire have to you?

To be honest, aside from the aforementioned moment of cosplay shenanigans, the beauty of being a pure spanko means that all I need to enjoy my kink is a human posterior and something to smack it with, as such, there is little need for any special clothing or costumes.

And I kinda like it that way, for the leather body-suits or PVC gimp masks that most people think of when BDSM is mentioned do absolutely nothing for me!

Day 29: Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, princess, goddess, ma’am, sir)?  What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?

The only terms I ever really use to describe my kink side are “spanko” and “switch”.

Much like the clothing question above, there is little need for titles when it comes to spank play, so my mind is not drawn to them like other people in the BDSM world are. Although, with that said, I am quite partial to “Miss” instead of “Mistress” or “Ma’am”, possibly as a result of all those school-based fantasies I had during my formative years!

Day 30: Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.

Over the last thirteen months, many kinky post ideas have popped into my head, notably those that overlap with the central theme of my blog; mental health. As such, I’ve decided to open this prompt up to you, my dear readers. What would you like me to write about?

To get your brains ticking over, here are a few ideas I’ve thought of writing about:

  • In a continuation of my ‘Confidence and Kink’ post, I’ve often thought about writing a series of posts that look at each aspect of my mental health (bipolar, PTSD, anxiety etc.) and exploring the effects my spanking fetish has had on them.
  • Similar to the above, I’ve often wanted to get my voices’ opinions on my spanking fetish. I know Meadhbh is all for it, as is Shay, but Audrey and Vanessa aren’t quite as keen. Perhaps a post written by them is what is called for.
  • Obviously, there are the posts about real-life experiences I want to write, but I need a little help to get those out of me! :p

But perhaps there are other burning questions and hitherto unexplored parts of my kinky side that have sprung into your minds over the last thirty days…ahem, thirteen months!

So feel free to leave any questions, suggestions and/or ideas in the comments field below, and remember, only those with a password can read those comments (and you don’t have to leave your name if you don’t want to!)

Writing about this side of me – however enjoyable and helpful – is still incredibly difficult, so I’d like to thank you all for your non-judgemental attitude toward these posts throughout the duration of this challenge. It means a lot to me! :)

handprint

Day 25: If I had the choice, I would like to be as open about my spanking predilection as I am about my bipolar, PTSD, social anxiety and homelessness. I would like to talk about it, share it with people and openly discuss it, but alas, I cannot, for having a spanking fetish is still looked down upon by the wider community.

~ Click here for a complete list of the 30 Days of Kink posts ~

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