All that I am, all that I ever was…

I am more than my mental health. I am more than my homelessness. I am more than any one aspect of me. I am Addy. And this is…

026 – 030. Salmagundi, Part 2 (Better late than never!)

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Five days ago I was supposed to be catching up with my 365 Day Blog Challenge with two posts, the first one was written and the second, wasn’t. The reason the second wasn’t is because after investing in a half price USB dongle I realised I had invested in a company that provides shoddy-at-best reception and thus have been offline since 2pm on Friday afternoon.

Now I am able to connect again, here is the second post I promised all those days ago, consisting of days 26-30 of the challenge. Enjoy :)

Day 26: 5 things you’re looking forward to

The Dark Knight RisesWhat does an (ex) homeless, affected by mental ill health socially ostracised person have to look forward to? You are indeed correct, the answer is nothing.

Certainly, I could say I look forward to death so this intensely painful existence can finally be over. Plus, I suppose I’m looking forward to the introduction of the carbon tax so I can sit back and watch the majority of middle-class Australian’s realise the apocalypse will not occur as a result of it – even if it means I, part of the sub-human class, will mostly likely become homeless again as a result.

But to conform to the rules of the challenge:

1. The completion of item number one from my Bucket List, as I mentioned here.

2. The Dark Knight Rises. ‘Nuff said :p

3. I look forward to the day where all my hard work, determination, strength and sacrifice pays off and I am no longer haunted by the abuse I suffered so I can live the happy, creative, non-isolated life I deserve.

4. A Legend of Zelda game where Zelda is the primary character, dashing around Hyrule being all acrobatic, daring and adventurous as she races to rescue Link, save Hyrule and defeat the evil that has (once again) taken hold of the land. What’s wrong with a woman saving the day for once? We need more kick-ass heroines in film, TV and video games.

5. The day where there is no such thing as discrimination; where everyone is accepted for who they are, regardless of all.

Day 27: a person you wished lived closer and why

My nephew; so I can meet the wee man and most likely scare him with my quality facial hair.

Day 28: something that makes you really angry

Just one thing?

How can I choose?

The Australian homeless crisis that no-one seems to care about; the devolution of our society into a self-obsessed, narcissistic cesspit where only the self matters; the appalling mental health treatment I have received throughout my life; discrimination; the appalling stereotypes reinforced by Fifty Shades of Grey; the price of electricity and other household necessities; reality television…

…fine, if I have to choose only one thing?

There is only thing that makes me angrier than abuse. To control, deceive, manipulate, belittle, lie, beat and destroy a human being is a deplorable, despicable act. To support, justify and defend such a person is inexcusable, making abuse sympathisers the thing that makes me most angry in this world.

Day 29: a date you’d love for someone to take you on

I can’t answer this question as it is likely to illicit some form of anxiety fuelled depressive period. Sorry, but to imagine things that I want, that are never likely to happen, is painful for me. The trauma from the abuse, social anxiety, my distrust of the human race and the discrimination against the homeless means I will unlikely never be on a date again, regardless of much I yearn for a candlelit dinner, spontaneous picnic under the stars or an evening at the theatre followed by lively artistic debate over a few glasses of wine and a chocolate pastry.

Day 30: 5 favorite girls names, 5 favorite boys names

Aurora Borealis, the colored lights seen in th...When I come to create a character I never start with their name. I begin by writing a short biography of their life as I dislike writing about someone without knowing them personally; where they were born, who their parents were, whether they have any siblings, major incidents (if any) of their childhood, how and to whom they lost their virginity (I’m a stickler for details) and continue onwards through any events that shaped who they are; their belief structure, moral standpoint and ethical values.

Once I have a full understanding of how they became the person up to the commencement of the story, I look at where their life is headed over the course of the plot and then bestow them a name that reflects who they were and what they will become.

For example;

Alexander; origin, Greek; form of Alexandros; meaning, defender of mankind.
One of the easiest characters to name given his character arc from birth to death. Born in Inverness to an abusive father, Alex overcomes an introverted, traumatic childhood to become a protective yet conflicted soul who ultimately dies at his own hand before achieving his prophesied destiny of saving the world.

Douglas; origin, Gaelic; form of, Dubhghlas; meaning, Black Water.
Pseudonym of Shay, and as with all of this character’s self-chosen nom-de-plumes derives from Gaelic to reflect (a) his heritage and (b) his state of mind at the choosing of the pseudonym.

Natalie; origin, Italian; form of, Natalia; meaning, Christ’s birthday.
Deciding on a name for my quintessential girl-next-door character was tough. It needed to be bland yet special as well as hint toward the culmination of her character arc.

Nothing too unique about this, most writers do the same thing, it was just especially important to me as names feature heavily in early folklore and myth (that’s old magic) and as the Chronicles were initially forged in this area I decided names should be important elements of my work.

As such, most of my favourite names appear in some form or another in the Chronicles.

My five favourite girls names:

Kira origin, Gaelic; form of, Ciara; meaning, little dark one.

Kathryn origin, Greek; form of, Katherine; meaning, pure.

Tara origin, Gaelic; form of, Teamhair; meaning, Craig; hill.

Gwendolyn origin, Welsh; form of, Gwendolen; meaning, white ring.

Aurora origin, Latin; form of, itself (Aurora); meaning, dawn.

My five favourite boys names:

Rowan origin, Gaelic; form of, itself (Rowan); meaning, little red one.

Magnus origin, Latin; form of, itself (Magnus); meaning, great.

Sawyerorigin, English; form of, itself (Sawyer); meaning, one who chops wood.

Alexander see above

Mackay origin, Gaelic; form of, itself (Mackay); meaning, son of the fiery one.

One thought on “026 – 030. Salmagundi, Part 2 (Better late than never!)

  1. Hello, fellow bi polar. I’m new to these blogs, am desperate to see if others have issues/symptoms problems and maybe helpful solutions ? (Ah well, that last bit turns me off-seems like nothing will keep me stable and safe for any lengthy period of time.) So…. I resonated with your opinion, “What do we have to look forward to? Nothing.
    Prior to being bi polar symptamatic, sure I had things to look forward to. But after 13 years of shear mayhem
    that bi bolar and it’s evil minions have wrought, I don’t think I will ever be the person I was, and it will take some serious miracles for me to look forward to future. Hard for others to understand.
    Thanks for sharing,
    Ladybug Flipper


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